\Life Seasons\

On my playlist:

“You say you’re through with love, well I’m tryna see who broke your faith… No need to rush we can take it slow, go at our own pace. Guarding your heart too defensively can turn a future lover into enemies.”

I Do, Kevin Ross

Hello, hello and welcome (back) to my journal! It’s been a minute since I have had the bandwidth to upload here and on the podcast. I wanted to check in with a ‘lil update for my readers. Is it just me or do the seasons of life sometimes carry more ebb than flow? As a young child, it seemed to take forever for a full year to pass. This whole ‘adulting’ thing is different, you hear me? Because before I can settle into the year it’s already time to head into the next. That pace makes it difficult for me to discern my current season AND allows very little time to get organized to the level I feel most comfortable and functional at. This prolonged state of disorganization and (what feels like) chaos has been taking its toll on me. I explore these notions a bit deeper on the Journey of Nikk podcast in the episode titled: ‘18. Hey Ya’ll | an update’ so be sure to give it a listen after you’re done reading here.

take a listen to the digital journal.

Today is the first time in a long time that I woke up with a pep in my step, looking forward to the day ahead. It’s Saturday, so my hubby is on Daddy duty while I take some time to just be Nikk. My plan was to wake and treat myself to breakfast, come home and catch up on my favorite YouTube creators as I FINALLY wash my hair. Styling was optional, the goal was to finally get this hair clean. On the way to get breakfast, I decided to record an update for the podcast and then edit and upload it. I was inspired by the song on my playlist so I wrote a short poem this morning as well. Writing is such a welcome release for me. I can’t even describe how much lighter I already feel. Simultaneously though… Although I’m enjoying this change of plans, I feel a bit rushed to get it all done. I only have this one day to do whatever I want or don’t want to do and it always goes by way too fast! (Sundays are the day I relieve my hubby so he can have time to just be him). As recording, editing, writing this post, etc. etc. was not in the plan, there’s not necessarily enough time to move as slowly as I would like to. But… I’m instructing myself to just live in this moment. Finish the upload(s), hit publish, and then move on to my hair before I head out for some girl time in the early evening. As my dear friend and mentor says, “It is well”. Although I don’t currently feel that sentiment, I know it to be true. So, I will stay the course until my feelings match what is true. If I cross your mind say a little prayer for ya girl, would ya? Thanks. :)

“I see that you’re holding back but that’s not you. You been and out like a drive-thru. You been going back, it’s a cycle. I’m tryna help you end it and show you all my intentions cause ooh, you know I do.” I Do, Kevin Ross

Poetry is such a big part of my life. I have been writing as far back as elementary school and have been published in a few anthologies. At one point in my ‘past life’ before marriage and kids I even recited my poetry on stages around town. I’m surprised I have yet to share that part of myself in this space but, today is the day! Here’s the poem I wrote this morning. You can hear me recite it on episode 18 of The Journey of Nikk podcast. However, my preferred way for my poetry to be consumed is by you reading it yourself. That way, you can hear it in your own voice and the piece can take on its own meaning for you, despite what it may mean in actuality. Enjoy this deeper peek into the core of Nikk.

On the path back to me 

Been a minute since I’ve felt like myself 

Peace has been evading like a thief running from the scene

I’ve been heavy 

Need to lighten up 

A little Kevin Ross and something warm in my favorite mug should help

on this slow Saturday morning 

Getting back to myself is a process 

I haven't had the bandwidth for in a hot minute 

I’ve been so deep in it 

Too deep to stop and look, to really see

“where‘s the malfunction?” and how to correct it

Let me just take a pair of seconds to reflect and dissect it all 

Need some self-care

Some soul care

Balm right there and there 

Let me FINALLY do my hair

Been at least a month of Sundays times 3 since the last wash

Judge your momma 

I’ve been struggling just to get out of bed 

Yes, my body is moving but where the heck is my head?

my mind is simply going through the motions

Mode of operation set to the ‘survival’ program 

Like a very sad robot 

I’ve been cold 

and distant to those who love me the most 

I just don’t have it in me to explain 

Again

That I’m scared and sad 

Again 

I need a win 

And a vacation 

Time to turn the station 

From depressing, low-tempo ballads 

To something I can dance to 

It’s my chance to find me again 

Feel free again 

This is just step one but already, 

I see it on the horizon 

Joy 

You’re a welcome sight

-Nikk 3.2.24  

©2024 This is an original work. It can not be used, distributed, featured, or copied without the express written permission of the author. All rights reserved.

how about you?

What re-centers you when you veer off course due to the seasons of life? What does ‘coming home to yourself’ mean to you?? Tell me about it!

Thank you for being here. I pray something you have read here inspires, empowers, or encourages you to be brave, be honest, and be well.

Until next time,

- nikk

Note: although AI is a super dope tool, all of these words are written directly from my own mind, unenhanced by technology. :)

pursuing courage

On my playlist:

Strength, Courage, & Wisdom - India.Arie

“In my head there lives a dream that I want to see in the sun. Behind my eyes there is a me that I’ve been hiding for much too long.”

Hey there!

It’s the first blog of 2024 and I am glad to see you here! Whenever you happen to be reading this, welcome! Here’s a rare in-real-time entry to encourage us as we start our year off with intention. I’m doing a new thing today - working from an open area in downtown Houston. That may seem very boring and vanilla to some readers but it is actually a pretty big deal for me. 

I’m not sure if I have always had some level of social anxiety but in recent years (the last 10 or so), it has become more prominent in my life. There have been times when I opted out of attending an event or gathering to avoid the anxiety that comes along uninvited every time I’m faced with the thought of a crowd. Rumbly tummy, sweaty everything, racing thoughts, hurried breathing; it sucks! If I could have avoided this scenario today, I certainly would have. 

take a listen to the digital journal.

My husband and I drove together to drop our son off at his new school. It’s a well-regarded private school here in our city that specializes in educating learners with neurological differences. (My son was diagnosed with Autism as a toddler). We have prayed, searched, and believed for the next phase in our son’s journey and it is finally here! We are so blessed that he is able to attend and we both wanted to take part in this special day. That meant that once the drop-off was done, I would accompany my husband to his downtown office and work from there. He assured me that there were plenty of spaces to work from. The remote work is no barrier, I am blessed to be a digital nomad as an entrepreneurial consultant so I can work from anywhere. I simply prefer the comfort and safety of my own home. I can predict what will happen, no one will be there but me, and I am free from the task of mounting the bravery it takes to navigate the unknown. 

Today when I arrived at the building, my husband escorted me around showing me the various options to set up shop for the day and tackle my to-do list. I was so nervous! I felt everyone was looking at me (they were not) and that everyone could hear my critical inner thoughts (not one person was concerned in the least). As I searched for the bathroom, walking in circles like a dazed tourist, I felt a wave of shame, annoyance, and panic threaten to overtake me. “What is your deal, girl?! Get it together!” I silently chastised. After several failed attempts to use a code to access the restroom, I finally managed to open the door. I huffed in and exclaimed out loud, “Oh Lord! I’m so uncomfortable. Is this going to be a terrible day?!” And in that moment, it hit me, like a refreshing splash of icy water: you choose. You decide if it will be a terrible day or not. I reminded myself, “You know several things to be true: This is the day the Lord has made. I can choose to rejoice and be glad in it. He promises to will never leave me nor forsake me. He is my refuge in times of trouble. He has promised me, Lo, I am with you even until the end of the age. Now Nikk, are you going to live as though you believe or nah?” After my internal pep talk, I realized two things. 1. I was going to change my posture and my perspective to turn this day around. and 2. I want what God has for me on the other side of comfort. 

“I close my eyes and I think of all the things that I want to see. Cause I know that I’ve opened up my heart, I know that anything I want can be”.

- Strength, Courage, & Wisdom - India.Arie

Beyond the place where I can predict what will happen, who I will encounter, and what challenges I will face; far past the scenarios where I can rest on my education or experience, miles away from the places and spaces my feet have traveled thus far; beyond the realm that I can think or imagine: I want the provision of paths untraveled. How will I ever encounter the blessings I’ve been praying and planting for, much less claim them for myself, if I never venture beyond what I know? 

Do I not trust that His protection will walk beside me? Do I not believe that His presence has already gone before me to prepare the way? Do I not trust that He is the God of the perfect plan; the creator of both the Heavens and the Earth and everything within them? Oh me of little faith! My God performs miracles with a thought and commands all elements with less than a whisper. Surely, he can navigate me through a day of co-working amongst strangers! Surely, he can lead me through any unknown place to a certain and destined future. Surely He has proven that He is both able AND faithful! Oh that I might trust Him and take Him at His word in this season. Oh that I might actually believe Him for the miracles He has promised. Oh, that I might walk as though He will surely direct my path and light my way. Lord, teach me how to trust You. Teach me how to move bravely in the face of Your power. There is no one or nothing more reliable than You. 

That said, I am moving bravely forward this year. Personally, professionally, and spiritually; I’m going to do what the old church folks taught when I was younger. I’m going to test and see that the Lord is GOODT!    

Stay tuned for the move of His hand. I’ll be sure to share. ;) 

So let it be.

- Strength, Courage, & Wisdom, India.Arie

If you want to commit to seeking His face this year, trusting that He will be found, I invite you to check out the prayer and fast I am facilitating through my operations consulting firm, Thrive Business Support. Listen to the Thrive Support podcast to learn more and click here to register for the fast. 

Do tell!

What has you excited and expectant this year? Email journeyofnikk@gmail.com or connect on socials @journeyofnikk to share.

Thank you for being here. I’m praying for a courageous 2024 for you and yours! I pray something you have read here inspires, empowers, or encourages you to be brave, be honest, and be well.

Until next time,

- nikk

Note: although AI is a super dope tool, all of these words are written directly from my own mind, unenhanced by technology. :)

essential Christmas playlist

Music means so much to me! Like many of us, the right song can solidify memories and uplift the most important moments. The holidays tend to be especially filled with Christmas music. Everywhere we turn, there is a holiday song helping us ring in and enjoy the season. When do you start to indulge in the sounds of the season? I tend to be a strong proponent that Thanksgiving should get its full shine before even the smallest Christmas tune can be embraced but this year, I let the tunes envelop me all through November. I’m surprised to say I really enjoyed it. Ya know I have a dope playlist, filled with so many Motown classics and 90s R&B. I have far too many favs to share them all but I’ve pulled out some that are on repeat every year.

take a listen to the audio journal.

Although, this is nowhere near an exhaustive list, here are 10 of my favorite Christmas songs:

1. What Christmas Means to Me - as performed by Fantasia

2. Let it Snow - BoyzIIMen & Brian McKnight

3. Someday at Christmas - Stevie Wonder (original)

4. Someday at Christmas - as performed by Mario

5. Mistletoe - Justin Beiber (lie and say you don’t love it!)

6. Sleigh Ride - TLC

7. I Want to Come Home for Christmas - Marvin Gaye (original)

8. I Want to Come Home for Christmas - as performed by Ne-Yo

9. The First Noel - Carrie Underwood

10. Little Drummer Boy - Pentatonix

11. Pentatonix! (any and every Christmas song they sing, whether cover or original)

12. This Christmas - Ledisi

Check out the Journey of Nikk podcast, episode ‘13. A few of my favorite things’ for more of my Christmas favorites.

I’d love to know: What’s on your Christmas playlist? Do we share any favs? When do you indulge in the sounds of the season? Reach out and let me know!

Thank you for stopping by.

I pray something you have read here inspires, empowers, or encourages you to be brave, be honest, and be well.

Until next time,

- nikk

Note: although AI is a super dope tool, all of these words are written directly from my own mind, unenhanced by technology. :)

lessons from my marriage

On my playlist:

I Do, Musiq Soulchild (from Life on Earth album)

“Sometimes I don’t like you. You always got a problem with everything that I do. I don’t always understand everything about you. But I know I just can’t live without you. So yeah, I do.”

My husband and I celebrated our ninth wedding anniversary this week. What a ride the last 9 years of marriage has been! In this time, there have been long seasons of Winter and turbulent seasons of Summer. There have been joyous periods of Spring and peaceful times of Fall. But I’m proud to say that my husband and I have weathered all seasons so far. We have learned so much about ourselves, one another, God’s love, our village, and so many lessons in between. It’s hard to process how much the two of us, and the way we relate to one another, has changed. We have evolved. As I reflect on the last 9 years (and the 14 years of dating that preceded it), I thought it fitting to share some of those lessons.

take a listen to the audio journal.

In no particular order, here are a few lessons I’ve gathered thus far:

1. If divorce is on the table, divorce is on the table.

2. Becoming one with my spouse requires me to discover, embrace, and surrender 100% of myself. In order to choose to love my hubby, I MUST choose to first love myself.

3. Marriage is the most honest mirror I have ever peered into - no reflection is more revealing.

4. Even on the roughest days, (or let’s be honest, the roughest years), my husband and our union is such a precious and dear gift.

5. The expectation of reciprocity can tarnish the joy, fulfillment, growth and care of selfless service. Reciprocity should not be a prerequisite to serving one another selflessly.

6. One need not fully understand or agree with the other in order to empathize, acknowledge, comfort, and even acquiesce.

7. Time alone does not foster growth. Effort + time + surrender is what culminates to grow a fruitful marriage.

8. No one can take up space in our marriage unless we create space and then invite them in. However, there is only room for three: me, hubby, and God.

9. We have the freedom and the responsibility to craft a marriage that works for us. No one has to agree with or approve of what we create.

10. Growing together means we are going to witness each other’s “ugly” and immature phases. We must grow in grace and remain loving through it all.

11. Through seasons of incompatibility, choosing love is what carries us. As long as our core beliefs remain aligned, we can make it work.

12. We should never abandon the connection to one another in the fight to be right, to be heard, or to be seen. That approach results in disconnection and misery.

13. There truly is no ‘i’ in team. Unless we both win, we both lose.

“I'm your canvas to your paintbrush
Paint me a picture of you
So when you're broken
I can reference, let my affection be glue

And let me put it all together
It's been good let's make it better
In love forever if it's alright with you
And say I do, I do, I do
This is my vow to you
Say I do”

Say I Do, Musiq Soulchild (from MusiqintheMagiq album)

Listen to me give deeper context to these lessons on the Journey of Nikk podcast, episode ‘10. Lessons I’ve Learned In Marriage’.

This list was surprisingly easy for me to write. I sat down to think and the lessons were right at the top of my mind and heart. I intended to write nine lessons for the nine years we have been married but about nineteen lessons flowed out so effortlessly. That makes me smile. I’ve listed many of them here but are you curious about the other lessons? Check out my YouTube video, “What marriage has taught me, so far”.

For my married peeps: How long have you been married? What lessons or key takeaways have you gathered so far? Help the class, Reach out and let me know!

For my single peeps who desire marriage: What are you hoping to learn from marriage?

Check out The Premarital Advantage, an e-course created by the How Married Are You?! Podcast to give you an advantage as you prepare for marriage.

Thanks for being here.

I pray something you have read here inspires, empowers, or encourages you to be brave, be honest, and be well.

Until next time,

- nikk

Note: although AI is a super dope tool, all of these words are written directly from my own mind, unenhanced by technology. :)

our origin story

On my playlist:

Where Would I Be (The Question) - Kindred the Family Soul

“You don’t recognize it but I tell you no lie. You’re the reason why my life has turned right. Every day I’m thankful. At times I don’t show you. My world would be incomplete if I didn’t know you.”

My husband and I will celebrate 9 years of marriage this month. I will be the first to say (followed by his close second) that it has NOT been an easy road. But there is no one I would rather walk this road, raise these kids, and grow ALL THE WAY UP with than him. Even in the toughest seasons, I simply cannot deny the gift that he is to my life. He is the mirror God knew I needed, and I am the same to him.

Having met in high school on the very first day of our ninth grade year, we have known one another longer than we haven’t at this point. I always feel nostalgic around the month of November as we both celebrate birthdays and our wedding anniversary.

Listen to the podcast episode, ‘09. Hubby, Lover, AND Best Friend? | Part 2’ to hear the story of the day we met.

“Every time you kiss me, you make me remember that sunny fall day at end of September. Boy I can’t imagine; what would I do if I didn’t know you? Who would I be if I didn’t know you?” -Where Would I Be (The Question) - Kindred the Family Soul

Although I could not find a lot of high school-era pics (I’ll update this post when I find a few more of my prom pics), we have captured a few memories along our journey.

Check out these photos of us and the family we are building.

Note: although AI is a super dope tool, all of these words are written directly from my own mind, unenhanced by technology. :)

is my husband my best friend?

On my playlist:

“I wanna know you in and out, I wanna know what you’re all about. I wanna know what makes you laugh. I wanna know about your past. I wanna know how you move. I wanna know so I can move too, I wanna know. But ya telling me I’m just a friend, tellin’ me I’m just a friend.”

Just A Friend, Mario

As I consider whether or not my hubby is my best friend, I can’t help but think back to our beginnings. The song on my playlist reminds me so much of being in high school, where my husband and I first met. Roaming the halls of that building with our friends and peers is where we got to know one another, built a friendship and, ultimately, formed the foundation for what would become our marriage. Only weeks away from our ninth-year wedding anniversary, I consider the question, “Is my husband my best friend?” In order to answer this question, I have to first ask myself a few more: “What is a best friend? What is a husband? And what do I actually want (as opposed to what I think I should want based on outside opinions). I explore these questions on the podcast in the episode titled: ‘Hubby, Lover, AND Best Friend?’

take a listen to the digital journal.

A few quick Google searches helped me build a glossary, of sorts, as I explored this question. Check out the definitions below:

With these definitions in mind, I am inclined to conclude that I do not consider my husband my best friend, nor do I want him to be. Yes, I want us to have a close bond, share the deepest parts of our lives and have fun together. But I would much prefer the designation of ‘covenant partner’ to ‘best friend’. That distinction provides clarity and a weightiness that I personally appreciate. In my book, there’s nothing that trumps a covenant partner. Our bond is the highest priority in relation to the other relationships in my life. Giving our relationship that distinct designation helps me to keep it in it’s rightful place. Don’t get me wrong, I can understand and appreciate couples who deem one another best friends. I just happen to need and want that distinction. I have learned about myself that exclusivity is a feature I seek in my relationships. The two of us sharing something that no one else does is what makes what is already special even more so. For me, that is true in every relationship, but especially in my marriage. I am fully aware that as I mature as a woman and a wife, as our marriage continues to evolve over the years, the opinions I’ve shared here may change. But for now, covenant partner is where it’s at!

“You can call me anytime you like, doesn’t matter day or night. We can do whatever you want to do it’s up to you.” Just a Friend, Mario

how about you?

Do you consider your spouse your best friend? Why or why not? Is there a different distinction or designation you prefer to use instead? Tell me about it!

Thank you for being here. I pray something you have read here inspires, empowers, or encourages you to be brave, be honest, and be well.

Until next time,

- nikk

Pssst! Want to walk down memory lane with me? Check out this post full of high-school-era pictures of my husband and I.

Note: although AI is a super dope tool, all of these words are written directly from my own mind, unenhanced by technology. :)

my favorite scriptures

“The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.

2 He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.

3 He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.

4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

5 Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.

6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.” - Psalm 23, KJV

Psalm 23 is one of my favorite passages in the Bible. Reciting the words, and thinking through their meaning always gives me such comfort. The King James Version in particular is solidified in my memory because that’s the version I memorized early in my youth, being raised in a small Baptist church. I believe I was a member of that church from birth and much of the foundation of my Christian faith was built between the wooden pews, hand fans circulating hot air, and expertly tickled organ keys of that little church.

The years of difference between that shy little girl and the woman I have grown into today have made this scripture come alive for me. As a mom, wife, business owner, disciple, etc. etc. I have come to know the Lord for myself. My faith has long since evolved from what I heard to what I have experienced and now know for myself. I have lived through what this scripture promises: even though I may be walking through the toughest, scariest, most dangerous situation, the most trying circumstance, I can do so with the confidence and assurance that my Lord, the maker of the Heavens and the Earth, walks with me. I can rest assured that He will lead and guide me, that He will correct me when I am wrong and re-direct me when I veer off course. I can know that He will ensure I have rest when I need it, that I take breaks and have water and am nourished for the journey. I can be still and know that no scheme of the enemy will prevail against me because the living God has my back, my front, and both my sides.

What a comfort! What good news! As I face troubles of many kinds, as fears occasionally threaten to derail the destiny He has prescribed for me, I go back to this scripture (and others like it) and I am comforted. I am encouraged, reminded, and re-energized. As I read and re-read this scripture, it’s not that the fears completely vanish. It’s not that I am never afraid again. It’s more so that my perspective is shifted. God’s truth has the ability to bring all other things into proper focus. Suddenly, my fears don’t look so daunting. The mountains don’t seem so impassable. The obstacles don’t seem so insurmountable. In fact, I know that everything is going to be alright because God is in control and His plans for me are better than I can imagine. That is great news! As the old folks used to say, “I think I’ll run on and see what the end gon’ be.”

Who remembers this song?!

“Be encouraged. No matter what’s going on. He’ll make it all right. But ya gotta stay strong. Be encouraged. Be encour-ou-ou-ou-raged!”

Be Encouraged, William Becton

Scripture is so important to me. Reading the Bible is one of the key ways I lean on God’s truth & power during times of fear and other emotions that want to rule my actions.

here are a few more of my favorite passages/verses 

“I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. 2 He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes[a] so that it will be even more fruitful. 3 You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you. 4 Remain in me, as I also remain in you. No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine. Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me.

5 “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. 6 If you do not remain in me, you are like a branch that is thrown away and withers; such branches are picked up, thrown into the fire and burned. 7 If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. 8 This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.” - John 15:1-8, NIV

4 Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! 5 Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. 6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. - Philippians 4:4-7

That person is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither — whatever they do prospers. - Psalm 1:3, NIV

When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze. - Isaiah 43:2

what are your favorite scriptures?

Do you have any scriptures, verses, or quotes that deeply encourage you? What helps to shift your perspective? What reminds you that hope is worth having? Reach out on socials or shoot me an email to let me know!

Take a listen to my latest podcast episode, Bravery in Action, where I talk about my experience with fear and how it affects my actions. Binge all the episodes here.

I pray something you have read here inspires, empowers, or encourages you to be brave, be honest, and be well.

Until next time,

- nikk

on my playlist:

Be Encouraged - William Becton

“I know right now it's impossible to see, but God is gonna work it out if you just believe. Remember this one thing while you're going through, if God delivered Daniel, He'll do the same for you."

Note: although AI is a super dope tool, all of these words are written directly from my own mind, unenhanced by technology. :)

do better, be better.

On my playlist:

I Choose - India.Arie

“I’ve reached a fork in the road of my life and ain’t nothing gonna happen unless I decide…”

Taking ownership of my health is something that has become increasingly important to me as the years go on. As I approach another birthday (November) , I realize that I am not yet old but I’m also not getting any younger. I’ve been having some really honest conversations with myself about changes I’m needing to make if I am going to live the long and healthy life I desire to live. Before I can adopt new habits, I need to acknowledge and discard habits that have been unfruitful.

take a listen to the audio journal.

Here are a few things I’ll be looking to adjust going forward:

Eat to live. Don’t just live to eat.

An improved diet is the most challenging habit change I want to make. I’m an emotional eater. Whether I’m happy, sad, overwhelmed, or relaxed, this girl likes to eat! I have realized that I often self-soothe with food. This is unhealthy and not conducive to the life of freedom and longevity I am wanting to enjoy. So, changes are on the horizon!

The Plan: gradually cut out the most unfruitful foods (fast foods), place serious limits on foods I tend to overindulge in (ice cream), and include new, healthy foods (starting with water, lol). I am also planning to explore different styles of eating (vegetarian, Mediterranean, etc.) to see what healthy habits I can incorporate into this lifestyle change. In addition to the diet changes, I will also be looking to adjust the non-eating habits that cause me to turn to food instead of healthier ways of processing my emotions.

Girl, go to sleep!

Getting adequate sleep does wonders for me, when I’m disciplined enough to get it. Unfortunately, insomnia has long been a friend of mine. Turning off my brain at night tends to be quite the process. However, I have noticed that when I read a book instead of turning on a tv show, video or scrolling social media, I am able to wind down more easily. Reading works to calm my brain enough to fall asleep, stay asleep, and wake feeling rested.

The Plan: It takes intention but reading before bed instead of any media is a practice I’d like to adopt as part of my bedtime routine. That way, I can regularly get the sleep my body needs to function at the highest, healthiest level.

“I choose. To be the best that I can be. I choose. To be courageous in everything I do. My past don’t dictate who I am, I choose.”

I Choose, India.Aire

Move, move, move!

In some ways, I’ve been overcomplicating the notion of movement. Somewhere along the way, I decided that the only movement that counts is exercise. But exercise is such a chore for me! Also, for some reason, I’ve decided I must exercise in a gym in order for the activity to count. Why am I putting all these rules & restrictions on movement? Anything that gets my limbs moving and my heart rate pumping counts as movement. So, I will be increasing movement activities that I actually enjoy.

The Plan: Dancing is something I thoroughly enjoy doing. It feels free and therapeutic and fun! Lord knows I have enough playlists to support a nice, long solo dance session. Having a daily dancing date with myself is a great place to start. Also, I am subscribed to a streaming platform that has a few interesting-looking workouts I’ve been scrolling past. Since I’m already paying for the access, I think it’s time to check those babies out!

What do you need to do better in order to be better? Do you have any suggestions of foods I should try, books you love and recommend, or interesting ways I can incorporate more movement into my day? Reach out and let me know!

Thanks for being here. If you haven’t already, please go take a listen to my audio-journal on your favorite podcast streaming platforms. I’d love for you to rate, review, and share it with someone you know would enjoy it.

I pray something you have read here inspires, empowers, or encourages you to be brave, be honest, and be well.

Until next time,

- nikk

Note: although AI is a super dope tool, all of these words are written directly from my own mind, unenhanced by technology. :)

my story, my voice

On my playlist:

Can You Stand the Rain - Boyz II Men

“ooooh. Nayhooooooo. Badadadaum nayhoo…”

“The power of perspective is that you can put an orange on a pedestal and ask three different filmmakers to make a film about it. You will get three different films, all meaningful in their own unique way.” (paraphrase from Pete Nicks. In Proximity Podcast, Episode title “Ryan Coogler and Pete Nicks” published Sun, Jul 23, 2023)

The concept expressed in this quote from my favorite documentary producer offers a perspective shift for me when I’m thinking about my voice and my story. Sure, there are many people who grew up in a similar neighborhood with a similar family structure and a similar set of values and experiences. The value is in my voice telling the story from my unique perspective. To reference the quote, yes, it’s the same orange. But how I experienced that orange, the words I choose and the ones I omit, the way I am shaped and affected by the orange is a unique story that is all my own. That story is worth telling.

take a listen to the digital journal.

For so long, I determined that my story was not unique enough, not interesting enough, and nothing anyone would ever want to hear. I have since decided that my story is absolutely unique, it is interesting, and the healing and catharsis I get from telling it is what makes it worth sharing. Also, my children and their children will need my story to understand and craft parts of their own story. My story in my own voice is precious to them. It’s an heirloom only I can gift to them. And so I will! I’ve talked myself out of it for this long because I decided I was not a skilled enough storyteller to share my story. Guess what? I need not be a skilled storyteller. I need only use my own voice. With all of its imperfections and flaws and beauty. This voice will evolve over time. As I am intentional about honing different techniques and exploring different mediums, I will undoubtedly become more skilled in the art of storytelling. But right now, I am at step one. And step one is simply telling the story.

As much value as there is in capturing my thoughts and experiences in my journals, there is just as much value in re-reading words I’ve written. Here are a few insights I gain from reading my old journals and the lessons contained within them:

reminders of God’s power, might, love, and faithfulness - Reading about situations I have overcome, and tragedies I have survived (as well as those I have been protected from) remind me in no uncertain terms that God has my back. He always has and He always will.

evidence of personal growth - My past journal entries offer proof that I have journeyed from one point to another. There is progressive growth happening, even when I can’t see it.

“Cause I need somebody who will stand by me. Through the good times and bad times they will always, always be right there.” Can You Stand the Rain, Boyz II Men

insight into areas of opportunity - In revisiting past journals, I am often reminded of unfinished lessons that I’ve compartmentalized. These are usually lessons that need my attention & intentionality so I can continue to improve and grow in those areas.

explanations of current behavior - Reading my previous journals helps me connect the dots between some of the results I am currently experiencing and the actions that have contributed to those results over time. It can be easy to forget what I’ve sown when it’s time to reap, especially if the fruit is bitter. This seed evidence helps me avoid the pointless act of blaming others (or misplacing credit). That way, I can focus on planting more favorable seeds and less unfavorable seeds for future fruit. Also, old entries help to explain my contribution to my kids' behavior. Some of those parent moments of “Where in the world did you get that from?!” become much clearer after reading old journals. lol

Allow me to leave you with a few questions:

What is your story? Are you sharing it? Are you doing so in your own, authentic voice? Why or why not?

If you are telling your story through a shareable medium, I’d love to check it out! Email or DM me.

I pray something you have read here inspires, empowers, or encourages you to be brave, be honest, and be well.

Until next time,

- nikk

Note: although AI is a super dope tool, all of these words are written directly from my own mind, unenhanced by technology. :)

who is nikk?

On my playlist:

Golden - Jill Scott

“I’m taking my own freedom. Putting it in my song. Singing loud and strong, grooving all day long.”

Hello, nice to meet you! I actually go by the name Nikki; Nikk is a nickname I call myself. For those who may be asking, “Why Nikk instead of Nikki?”It's not that exciting but I will address it here because I would wonder if I were on the other side of the screen. In short, Nikk is the name I use most often when I am referring to myself while thinking of and/or talking to myself. Because I often process my thoughts aloud, I talk to myself alot (don't you judge!) During those talks, Nikk is the name I most often use.

My given name is actually Domonique. I have had many nicknames throughout my lifetime but my core family (i.e. Mom, sisters, Dad) call me Nique. My maternal grandmother always called me Nikki. I’m not sure why she chose Nikki; people of a certain age do what they want. For some reason, that name stuck and because I wasn't the biggest fan of the name Domonique (it would often get mispronounced and misspelled, which is more annoying than you'd think), I just began to introduce myself as Nikki. So while I've always gone by Domonique in more official settings, most people only know me as Nikki.

But I know myself as Nikk.

She is the most raw, authentic, pure version of myself.

To answer the question "Who is Nikk?" I'd have to say, I am still discovering and deciding that. Every day, I am being intentional about paying attention to my motives, my quirks, the things and people I gravitate towards and away from. I am learning who I am today, (like who I truly am; good, bad, and in between), assessing what no longer serves me and what's missing, and taking action accordingly.

take a listen to the digital journal.

I had a revelation a few years ago: you get to decide who you will be. In spite of what you had or did not have, in spite of where you came from, the examples you saw or didn't see, ultimately, it's you who gets to decide what your life will look like. That revelation was incredibly empowering for me. It means I'm not beholden to the destiny my circumstance has created for me. By doing the tough work of becoming, of being intentional about doing the work and cultivating wellness, I can curate a life that is good now and produces the legacy I desire for tomorrow. I can be a good steward. So, I am intentionally learning how to steward my life well. This journal, and the podcast that goes along with it, is a documentation of that learning.

my assigned vehicles of learning / the gardens I tend for growth

Mothering my two precious toddlers while refining a covenant relationship with my husband helps me to flex my stewardship muscle. They teach me so much about myself and love me while the rough parts are being pruned away. The assignment of mother and wife, along with my professional assignment of stewarding the visions of influential creatives of color at my operations firm, Thrive Business Support, keeps me in the constant practice of being mindful of what it means to steward well. I am careful to surround myself with people and opportunities that spur me to take action alongside that mindfulness.

At the moment, Nikk is a disciple of Jesus, a woman in progress, a wife, a mother, an entrepreneurial vision steward, a daughter, a sister, a friend, and a host of other titles. I am progressing in purpose, on purpose as I learn to steward well.

“I’m strumming my own freedom, playing the God in me. Representing His glory. Hope He’s proud of me.” Golden, Jill Scott

For my skimmers (I see you) here is a summary of who I am:

topsoil (i.e. commonly shared, easily discoverable facts): Black woman, married mother, Christian, entrepreneur, sibling of 4, aunt of 8; lover of neutral colors, flavored ice cream, soul-driven music and vulnerable artistic expressions in all mediums

roots (i.e. where I come from, what grounds me): early mornings, long days, and late evenings in the pews of a small Baptist church on the southwest side of Houston, Texas; shared laughs, tears, bedrooms, punishments, and traumas with two sisters who taught me to cherish beauty in all its varied forms; unedited advice and enumerable sacrifices from my incredibly talented mother; a kindred reflection of self from my first love, my father; up close lessons taught by brave, bold, flawed women who let me close enough to truly see them; Summers filled with cool cups, corner store trips and neighborhood exploration with soo many cousins; learning the mercy, faithfulness, and power of a living God for myself

fertilizer (i.e. what fuels me & my growth now): new words, enthusiastic cuddles, and uncontrollable giggles overflowing from my son, soaring duets of Lin Manuel songs and random declarations of “I love you mommy!” from my daughter; 21-year-old inside jokes, Marvel movie marathons, and sensual slow dances with my hubby; great food, sobering advice, and belly laughs with friends; steadfast, Biblically-based, deeply human examples from my mentors; a drive to be well and fruitful in all areas of my life for the now and for the benefit of those who will follow.

at the core (how I spend my time): hours and hours of singing, dancing, writing poetry and prose; curating my empathy through documentaries, podcasts, books, and deep conversations; praying, crying, and rejoicing for others; serving as I am blessed to serve; and savoring the peace and reflection found in the silence when no one else is around.

Tell me about you!

Email journeyofnikk@gmail.com or connect on socials @journeyofnikk to share something about yourself.

I pray something you have read here inspires, empowers, or encourages you to be brave, be honest, and be well.

Until next time,

- nikk

Note: although AI is a super dope tool, all of these words are written directly from my own mind, unenhanced by technology. :)

let it be.

On my playlist:

Let It Be - Jill Scott

“let it be, whatever it is, whatever it is let it be, let it be, whatever it is let it be, let it be, let it…”

I have decided that whether this offering is a failure or a success, whether it exceeds my wildest dreams or falls flat, whatever it may turn out to be I will at least allow it to be. So often I have allowed the fear of ‘what if’ to rob me from ever trying. It goes like this: I have an idea, decide to pursue it, and do a bit of excited planning. Out of nowhere, thoughts of all the ‘what ifs’ swoop in. In the past, I have allowed those thoughts to slow my momentum, steal my joy, and render me paralyzed, resigned to simply dream or busy myself with planning that never evolves into action. Not anymore. This journal and podcast will be.

take a listen to the digital journal.

And more ideas after this one will definitely see the light of day, as well. The truth is that other people (some with far worse offerings) are fearlessly letting their voices be heard, their ideas have space, and their dreams become realities. So why not me too? I am excited to do more with my ideas. So that I remember going forward, I’ve noted a few reminders to myself about how NOT to kill an idea in its infancy. Perhaps there’s a seed or two here for you as well…

The Goldilocks Plan

Having a well-thought-out plan that takes key factors into consideration is of vital importance. I always preach that to anyone who will listen and I likely always will. However, there is a danger in seeking the ‘perfect’ plan. We all know, ‘perfect’ just does not exist. In the planning phase, I need to ensure I don’t put so much time and detail into planning that I needlessly delay the MVP (minimum viable product). The phase that immediately follows the planning phase is the one that will give me the crucial data I need. By delaying it, I cripple myself. I can’t spend so much time formulating a plan that is ‘just right’ only to never implement any plan at all. (side note: God’s plan is the one that will actually prevail in the end so I need not waste time or energy overthinking my own.)

On the flip side, I want to avoid putting so little time and effort into my plan that I aimlessly waste or overlook resources because of the lack of direction.

The Fix: create draft 1 of the plan and implement it! What’s most important is to get the idea down on paper and into the world so it can live and breathe. I can then allow the data I gather to clarify and improve my plan going forward. God guides feet that are in motion.

The Rule of ‘Too’

Great ideas are exciting. The temptation is to share those ideas with everyone you love (and/or strangers you’ve connected with) so they can share your excitement. But, in the words of my girl Jill Scott, “Everythang ain’t for everybody”. Unfortunately, everyone will not be excited for me. I must remember that if I share too many details with too many people too soon, I could expose myself (and my fragile idea) to some unintended consequences. In one scenario, I risk drowning in the haterade brewed by those without vision. I risk subjecting my new baby idea to the cruel (often illogical) court of public opinion where the fears of others could stoke, reinforce, bolster, or even awaken my own fears. In another scenario, I risk being gassed up by those who mean well but simply aren’t educated or experienced enough in the area of my idea to properly advise me.

The Fix: form my board of trustees. This board of trustees is a group of people I can run ideas by and lean on for expert advice, encouragement, and support. I like the idea of having different boards for different areas of life (i.e. personal, business, marriage, motherhood, etc.) Most importantly, I can depend on my trustees for confirmation of the word God has already spoken to me (because of course, His is the very first opinion I will seek).

“Why, do do do, I, I, I, I feel trapped inside a box when I just don’t fit into it. Maybe I’ve been scared knowing what’s there in front of me. Maybe I’ve been tryna be what they needed me to be. When I shoulda just been me…” Let it Be, Jill Scott

The Land of ‘What If’

This is the birthplace of the Goldilocks Plan. When starting a new project or moving forward on a new idea, the research phase (much like the planning phase) is vital and is a step that should not be neglected. However, research is just generalized book knowledge before you have any hard data to filter through it. I can be guided by best practices and what has worked for others but before I take any action on my idea, I won’t have any concrete data at all. I must take care not to set up residence in the Land of What If, where hypotheticals and emotion-driven actions roam freely, unencumbered by logic or fact.

The Fix: Challenge ‘what if’ with what is. I need to move forward, gather factual data, and improve future decisions armed with what did, what is, and what did not vs. what if.

Avoiding these three idea killers gives my idea a chance to actually become fully formed and be birthed before I decide that it will not be. I trust I will revisit these reminders often as I release more ideas into the world.

I pray something you have read here inspires, empowers, or encourages you to be brave, be honest, and be well.

Until next time,

- nikk

Note: although AI is a super dope tool, all of these words are written directly from my own mind, unenhanced by technology. :)

the journey begins

Hello, hello, and welcome! In this very first entry, I will answer many of the why’s behind the journey of nikk. Future entries may differ but today, I offer this FAQ-style blog. Enjoy!

what is the journey of nikk?

The Journey of Nikk is an audio journal podcast and digital journal detailing the musings of me, Nikki Harrison.

why are you doing this? 

In pursuit of wellness. That’s the short answer. All that I’ve restricted myself from, the years of silencing my own voice and stuffing down my perspective and offerings that should have been released have caught up to me and are, in combination with a few other factors, affecting my mental health. So in pursuit of wellness, I’m doing something I’ve been dreaming of doing for literal decades. By being brave enough to use my voice and honest enough to speak truthfully, I’m hoping to discover a holistic wellness that permeates every area of my life. I pray the journal and podcast serve others but they absolutely will serve me and my wellness.

“Tomorrow may never come, for you or me life is not promised. Tomorrow may never show up, for you or me this life is not promised… Shine your light for the world to see.” - Umi Says, Mos Def

what do you hope to accomplish?

In this chapter of my life, I am committed to becoming the version of myself God originally designed. As a catalyst to this transformation, I will pursue wellness and adventure in ways I never gave myself permission to before. From the mundane to the more impactful, I am giving myself the permission, the grace, and the space to be all that I am so I can grow into all that I am meant to be. There is much to discover and remember ahead. I don’t have all the details sorted out at this moment but I have decided that’s ok. My prayer is that by sharing my revelations, insights, and musings along the journey, I show others that they too can (and should) choose to live bravely, be honest, and be well.

when can I listen/read?

New episodes of the podcast will be uploaded bi-weekly-ish on Fridays (with a bonus episode in between, from time to time). New entries will be added to the journal as written. That could be weekly, bi-weekly, shorter, or longer. I will allow the schedule to unfold as it does.

This journal will be a peek into my thoughts. The accompanying podcast allows me to process & share those thoughts in my own voice. Take a listen here. I will also share periodically on YouTube, Instagram, Threads, and other social platforms. I would love for us to get to know one another! Engage via socials or visit the contact page to get in touch.

I pray something you have read here inspires, empowers, or encourages you to be brave, be honest, and be well.

Until next time,

- nikk

on my playlist:

Umi Says, Mos Def

“I put my heart and soul into this. I hope you feel me. From where I am to wherever you are. I mean that sincerely.”